Turning tragedy into charity: How I became a Toys for Tots convert

Seven months ago, my spouse walked into my place of employment and told me that one of our best friends had been shot and killed.

It's been seven months and we've all begun to move on - all of Steve Gale's friends and family are slowly teaching themselves to exist in a world without Steve in it. We're all achieving this with varying degrees of success.

Wednesday would have been his 28th birthday. On Facebook I saw that some people were heading to a park up in Reno to have a sort of birthday celebration for him. My spouse (an avid homebrewer) and I discussed the memorial beer we're planning on brewing in his name. Wednesday was just a very Steve-ish day, and I found myself feeling listless and a little off-kilter. I strongly felt that I needed to put something positive out into the universe, in Steve's memory.

When I learned that Toys for Tots needed some volunteers to help fulfill present requests, I jumped at the chance, both in Steve's honor and because I remember my own childhood. Being gifted with presents from people you've never met in your life does tend to change one's perspective.

Everyone I told seemed surprised: I am the consummate grinch. I loathe Christmas. I don't celebrate it myself, refusing to buy for or receive gifts from anyone except my two stepchildren. But I haven't forgotten, and this was my chance to give back - and to put a positive vibe out there.

I arrived and spoke to Joyce, the woman in charge. She's the director of the Ron Wood Family Resource Center, and the coordinator for all Carson City Toys for Tots stuff.

Joyce was very friendly and helpful, helping people pick out appropriate gifts. Gifts were sorted by age, gender, and in some cases, by type. There were bins for clothing (which Toys for Tots passes on to other nonprofit organizations), and for broken or inappropriate toys. We carefully made sure that no kid got an amazing gift while their sibling was slighted. It was a science, but it was fun in a weird way.

I noticed right off that there was a discrepancy. There were loads of toys for those in the 4 - 12 age range, but nearly nothing for teenagers. Joyce pointed it out as well, noting that sometimes the organization even fulfills requests for adults into their twenties who have special needs. I felt incredibly guilty as I stuffed some of these bags for older kids with games of Parcheesi - what sixteen-year-old wants a board game?

Maybe I'm just too empathic towards these amorphous youth. Maybe I shouldn't care this much, but I do. This grinch's heart melted at the thought of a teenager having to deal with a bad Christmas in addition to navigating the social constructs of high school, the increased workload we expect of our students nowadays, and the pitfalls of being impoverished. That's too much for most adults to handle, and I refuse to accept that it's alright for an adolescent to do it.

My income is sketchy at best, but when I get paid I'm going to Big Lots and buying at least one mp3 player. Maybe some makeup kits. Something, anything, so that the older kids can have something decent for Christmas too.

I can't tell you to do the same, but I can ask. Politely, mind, so here it is:

If you're reading this, please consider buying something appropriate for a teenager this Christmas, and dropping it in your nearest Toys for Tots drop-off bin. If you can't make it to the store, visiting carson-city-nv.toysfortots.org will supply a donation link. Joyce goes shopping for gifts with all monies donated via the website or in-person. They take donations right up until Christmas Eve. There will also be a major Toys for Tots event Dec. 17 and 18 (that's a Saturday and a Sunday) in front of both Wal-Mart locations. Marines will be in front to collect toys, so consider at least stopping by and thanking them for their service.

If you're a parent or guardian in need of their services, you can call 884-TOYS, which is the Toys for Tots hotline. It's available from 9 a.m. - noon and 1 - 4 p.m. Monday through Friday. They're accepting applications until the 20th of December.

If you want to volunteer, go ahead and give Joyce a call at the Ron Wood Family Resource Center. Her phone number is 884-2269. I'll see you there.

If you have any questions, email T. Costa at tcosta@carsonnow.org.