What Works: When life does the opposite of what you want

Like a trooper, I woke up and got to the airport in time for a 5:30 a.m. departure. I had it all together. A friend agreed to take me. Yes, even that early! I have great friends. I had pre-packed my bag the night before. I had planned to sleep and then do some work. I had it all planned out.

Then, there was an equipment failure and my flight was cancelled. Sometimes, it seems, no matter how you line things up, things don’t work out as planned. I was supposed to be writing this column 30,000 feet in the air. I was supposed to be in Washington DC right now. Instead, I’m on my trusty couch at home, staring down a red eye at 5:30 p.m. Monday.

What was interesting was the range of reactions to this cancelled flight. Some bum rushed the counter. Some picked up the phone and called the rebooking number. Others just gazed in disbelief. It’s how we handle the uncontrollable that says a lot about us.

What do you do when life does the opposite of what you want?

Injustice: The world was out to get them. These passengers uttered statements like “this always happens to me” and “I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed this morning.” These statements were the saddest to me because these people truly believed that they are the unlucky ones. If you go to injustice when things don’t go your way, ask yourself why. Would you like someone you know talk to you the way you talk to you?

Thinking of Others: The people who called their loved ones before rebooking their flight were interesting. I heard one woman say, “maybe me coming to see you just won’t work out.” Now, she did get on the phone and rebook. However, there’s a saying on the airplane in case of a drop in cabin pressure. Put your own mask on first and then help someone else. Decisiveness saves lives and flight reservations.

Worrying about Consequences: There were a few who sat there and just worried about what it would mean for them to miss part of their trip. In general, if you are stuck in a situation truly out of your control, people understand. Now, if you were indignant and cut it close in your flights and you were warned not to, that may be another thing. However, this is a time to have faith in the empathy other people possess. And breathe…

Blaming: The people who blamed the airline were angry. I felt so bad for the people at the counter, who were also powerless over the situation. Venting may help. However, venting powerlessness at powerlessness is pointless. Unfortunately, airlines reward this behavior with vouchers and other placations. So, they get a good share of blamers who, instead of calling the phone number to rebook want to talk to a person to get the most out of the situation.

Self-Soothing: Then there were the people who did nothing for a while, absolutely nothing. They took a big long pause before doing or saying anything. They were processing. When in doubt of what to do, this reaction can be a really good one. Take some time to breathe and just be for a bit. Then, when ready, take action.

Taking Action: This was me. I was pretty quick to take action and called the number ten times before it was activated, so I could be first. They told me the action was to call the number, I called the number. I was rebooked on the red eye, which was the only flight that would have gotten me there. After I did that, I emailed and called my client to let her know I wouldn’t be in DC as planned and we worked out our plan. My mask was on first, then I handled the impact.

Gratitude: This was nice to see. Some passengers talked about how good it was that we were not put on a plane with equipment failure. We talked about being able to do some other things today in lieu of taking the flight. I was really tired. So, I was grateful for sleep and the ability to write this column from home. Ultimately, the cancelled flight gave me material too.

This week, your challenge is to consider how you handle situations which are out of your control. Do you bring out the blow torch and scorch the earth? Do you beat yourself up? Do you place others before yourself? Or, do you self-manage: either by self-soothing, taking action, or showing gratitude for the change? If you or someone you know needs this message, share this article with them or comment below.

Now, to get ready for my overnight flight.

GET MOTIVATED


Ongoing: Motivation Monday with Diane Dye Hansen at Adams Hub for Innovation from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. (Up to two free 30-minute face to face sessions. Email grow@adamshub.com to schedule an appointment).



September 13, 2017: Entrepreneurs Assembly at Adam’s Hub for Innovation, inside The Studio. 5:30 pm, free mastermind group.



September 18-20, 2017: Workshop: “Success After Abuse: Empowering Women to Assert Themselves After Leaving an Abusive Relationship” - Nevada Coalition to End Domestic and Sexual Violence Conference, Atlantis Casino and Resort, Reno.

Schedule a complimentary 30-minute phone consultation with Diane any time at whatworkscoaching.com.

What Works Coaching

Diane Dye Hansen is the Chief Inspiration Officer of What Works Coaching, an individual and organizational coaching and consulting firm based in Carson City. She has 20 years of experience working with top corporations, growing businesses, motivated entrepreneurs, and individuals hungry for a fresh start. Diane holds a Bachelor’s in Business Administration and Marketing from Cal State San Bernardino. She is also a candidate for a Master’s degree in Communications Management from the University of Southern California. Her column appears every Monday, and sometimes Tuesday, in Carson Now.