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What Works: Be Present
In the hustle and bustle of getting presents bought, healing from a respiratory infection, and doing everything else that makes the holidays merry and bright, I drew an absolute blank for a topic for my column until last night. It wasn’t until I met with a client of mine that I got served up some of my own gravy. She said, "be present."
It’s easy to get caught up in the busyness of the holidays and not pause. Pause to look at the lights. Pause to hold eye contact. Pause to notice there is mistletoe above your head. Pause and be present.
Sometimes it can be hard to pause, to breathe, to be present in the world swirling around us. I’ve compiled a few tips I have learned over time. I hope, if slowing down is your goal this holiday season, they will help you. Your presence will be a gift to those around you.
Tip #1: Put down the cell phone.
In the era of social media, and all-in-one devices, this could be difficult. But I will tell you, it is worth it. Wait until after your event is over to post your photos to social media. Stay with the people in the room and give them your full attention. Notice what you experience.
Tip #2: Christmas chaos? Breathe.
Coming back to the breath isn’t just for meditation. When everyone is trying to create the perfect holiday and nothing is coming out perfect, breathe. Breathing will help you come back to yourself, center your thoughts, and help you make sense of whatever is going on.
Tip #3: Chew slowly.
Mindful eating is one way to slow down and savor the holiday. Hosts cook for hours and then a meal gets gobbled down in minutes. Take time around the table this holiday and savor the spread. Notice the food's flavor and texture. Smell the food and let it permeate your senses. Another side effect of mindful eating is you will eat quality over quantity. This will make the meal more enjoyable.
Tip #4: Maintain eye contact.
For some, this a breeze. For others, maintaining eye contact can be a challenge when there is so much to focus on. If you accept this challenge, you may find yourself having conversations with more depth. There’s a vast difference between meaningful eye contact and forced staring. Staring decreases likability. Eye contact shows caring, interest, and appeal, according to an article in Forbes magazine.
Tip #5: Actively listen.
Great conversations are born when the listener asks questions. These questions could ask for clarification or dig deeper into the subject matter of the conversation. You have to be present to listen in an active way. It doesn’t work if you check out. Committing to this kind of listening will create connections and enhance your holiday experience.
This week’s challenge: Try one. Pick one or two tips and try them out at a party. Notice how your experience is different. What do you notice when you make an effort to be more present? Comment below.
LEARN FROM DIANE AND EMBRACE CHANGE IN 2017
January 6, 2017: “Vision Boards and Statements Workshop” – Gaia Wellness and Yoga, Carson City, NV – $20/Adults, $10/Ages 10-18. Purchase your ticket here.
What Works Coaching gift certificates are available! Give time to your team for the perfect holiday office gift. Email diane@whatworkscoaching.com for details.
What Works Coaching
Diane Dye Hansen is the Chief Inspiration Officer of What Works Coaching, a business coaching and marketing services firm based in Carson City. She has 20 years of experience working with top corporations, growing businesses, motivated entrepreneurs, and individuals hungry for a fresh start. Diane holds a Bachelor’s in Business Administration and Marketing from Cal State San Bernardino. She is also a candidate for a Master’s degree in Communications Management from the University of Southern California. Her column appears every Monday, and sometimes Wednesday on Carson Now.
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