• Carson Now on Facebook
  • Follow Carson Now on Twitter
  • Follow Carson Now by RSS
  • Follow Carson Now by Email

Pine Nuts: Fear of public speaking? Here's what Mark Twain would say

Public speaking is one of mankind’s greatest fears. A young lady once told me that she would rather have a coyote gnaw on her arm than to have to speak in public. This does not have to be. Once you understand that the public does not care to hear a message, but would love to hear a story, it’s like wrapping your dog’s medicine in a treat, and the public speaker need only wrap her message in a story.

As our mutual friend Mark Twain tells us, “A good story should have a little humor in it. The comic story is English, the witty story is French, and the humorous story is American. The English and French stories depend upon the matter for their effect, where the American story depends upon the manner for its effect.

Here’s an example of an English story.

In the course of a battle a soldier whose leg had been shot off appealed to another soldier who was hurrying by to carry him to the rear, whereupon the generous son of Mars, shouldering the unfortunate, proceeded to carry out his desire. The bullets and cannonballs were flying, and presently one of the latter took the wounded man’s head off—without, however, his deliverer being aware of it. He was hailed by an officer, who shouted:

“Where are you going with that body?”

“To the rear, sir — he’s lost his leg!”

“His leg? You mean his head, you booby.”

Whereupon the soldier dispossessed himself of his burden, and stood looking down upon it in great perplexity.
“It is true, sir, just as you have said. But he TOLD me it was his LEG!”

(It’s enough to make you want to renounce joking and lead a better life.)

No, the humorist’s job is merely to show us the good-natured side of the truth. And the humorist is not looking for a laugh. The humorist is looking for a nod of acknowledgment, or the hint of a smile. There is a vast difference between the comedian and the humorist.

The comedian’s job is to make us laugh, and laughter is good for us, it’s like massage on the inside, it’s like money in our pocket because it cuts down on the doctor bills. But laughter, without a thread of philosophy woven into it, is but a sneeze at humor, genuine humor is replete with wisdom.

Yes, the humorous story may be spun out to great length, and may wander around as much as it pleases, and arrive nowhere in particular. So don’t be afraid to use it while public speaking. Tell your story from the heart, and it will be well received.

As is our custom, we shall leave the last word to Mr. Twain: “If a piece of humor is to last, it must do two things, it must preach and it must teach. If done effectively, that piece of humor will last forever -which is thirty years.”

For more than 35 years, in over 4,000 performances, columnist and Chautauquan McAvoy Layne has been dedicated to preserving the wit and wisdom of “The Wild Humorist of the Pacific Slope,” Mark Twain. As Layne puts it: “It’s like being a Monday through Friday preacher, whose sermon, though not reverently pious, is fervently American." Go here for the spoken word version of this and other columns.

Top Stories

... or see all stories

Camp GOTR (Girls on the Run) is coming to Carson City for the second year in a row! Camp GOTR will be a week-long, half-day summer camp from 8 AM- 12 PM at the Carson City Community Center the week of August 5th- August 9th.

Girls on the Run Sierras is a character-building program for girls in 3rd through 8th grade operating in the Reno-Tahoe area.

A number of new Junior Park Rangers received their badges as they were sworn in as part of the annual Junior Park Rangers Day in Carson City.

The next Carson City Board of Supervisors meeting will be held on Thursday, May 2, 2024 beginning at 8:30 a.m. in the Bob Crowell Boardroom of the Community Center, located at 851 E. William Street.

For many students at Carson High, Monica Weaver serves as a counselor who is dedicated to helping students navigate the challenges that could alter one’s four years of high school. But in the spring, Weaver also stands poolside, coaching the Senators swim team.

Meet Ricky and Reba, a sweet bonded pair who are waiting for their forever home. Sometimes bad things happen to good cats. Nobody knows this better than Ricky and Reba. Approximately 3 years old, they were abandoned when their owner moved, leaving them to fend for themselves on the streets of Reno. It wasn’t easy.

The 120 pounds of litter collected during the inaugural Shoreline Sweep Volunteer Cleanup at Sand Harbor State Park will be used in an innovative art installation in the park's visitor center.

Over 80 dedicated volunteers joined forces to comb the park's picturesque shores on Monday, April 22, 2024.

Warmer weather is upon us – finally – which also means so is the ever popular and very educational ComputerCorps TechCamp Summer Series! Yes, summer is just a few months off and ComputerCorps TechCamp 2K24 is now accepting applicants.


On April 24, 2024, at approximately 4:48 a.m., the Nevada State Police responded to a crash at the location of IR580 southbound near mile marker CC01 in Carson City, Nevada. (Near the Snyder Ave. overpass).

Each year, the Carson City Sheriff’s Office hosts an open house event as a way to connect families, deputies, non-profits and more. This year the event takes place May 11 from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m.

Douglas County officials have announced that construction will begin soon on the first phase of the Muller Parkway Project. The project aims to alleviate traffic congestion in Minden and Gardnerville, offering an alternative route to the main U.S. Route 395 through town. The decision comes as the County moves to fill its requirement to construct 2.4 miles of two-lane road by 2025.

Carson High School is pleased to announce Katarina Klatt and Brynn Russell will carry their academic and athletic talents on to the next level with Division 1 Scholarships. A short signing ceremony was held at the Carson Aquatic Center Wednesday, April 24, 2024.

The United States Postal Service (USPS) is moving forward with its plan to transfer certain mail processing operations from Reno to Sacramento, a change that has drawn bipartisan opposition among Nevada elected officials over its potential impact on the region’s economy and fears that it would slow the processing of ma

A 32-year-old Silver Springs man was arrested Wednesday and booked for charges associated to a fentanyl drug overdose in December 2023, according to the Lyon County Sheriff's Office.

The Division of Child and Family Services, Nevada’s Department of Health and Human Services, invites the community to participate in the 2nd annual “Walk Us Home” 5K for Foster Homes on Saturday, April 27, 2024 in Carson City.

The Washoe County Regional Medical Examiner’s Office has identified two Carson City residents who died in a wrong way crash early Wednesday morning in Carson City.

Nevada Humane Society, Carson City’s Pet of the Week introduces, Shrek. While he may not hail from a swamp, this lovable pup is as big-hearted as they come, searching for his forever family.

Bowers Mansion Programs on the Porch program begins in May with this year's theme is "Variety Edition." Bring a blanket or chair and enjoy this free series in front of the historic Bowers Mansion. Fridays from 7 to 8 p.m., May 17 through June 21.

LGBTQ+ and Allies, community event, Carson Valley events, Western Nevada, gay

Two free scholarship lunch tickets are available on a first-come, first-served basis for those who couldn’t otherwise afford to participate. Reach out to wnvlgbtq@gmail.com and request your free tickets now!

St. Paul's Lutheran Family Church in Carson City is having a huge rummage sale Saturday, April 27 at 8 am until 1:30 pm. This is a fundraiser by St. Paul's women's group, WELCA, in association with Thrivent. There will be a jewelry room and a boutique featuring decor de jour and collectibles.

Carson City area casino gaming revenue was up slightly in March, according to the Nevada Gaming Control Board. Statewide, revenue was down 1.65 percent compared to March 2023.

The Carson City School District is pleased to announce Empire Elementary School’s STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Math) Teacher Adrienne Wiggins has been selected as a Nevada finalist for the Presidential Awards for Excellence in Mathematics and Science Teaching, the nation’s highest honors for teachers of science, technology, engineering, mathematics and computer science.

Nevada's seasonally adjusted unemployment rate was 5.1 percent in March 2024, which decreased by 0.1 percent from February 2024, according to the state's Department of Employment, Training and Rehabilitation’s March 2024 economic report.

Carson High Debate continues its groundbreaking season. Competing at state for the first time since Covid the team advanced to final events in 4 separate events.

Clear Creek Bowmen Cancer Shoot is this Sunday April 28 at the Carson City Archery Range.

Carson Medical Group broke ground on their new 31,000 square foot facility off old Hot Springs Road in October 2022 and this June it will officially open its doors to patients.

The facility, located at 1946 Old Hot Springs Road, will house the primary care physicians, their Ear/Nose/Throat practice, as well as the CMG+ walk-in clinic.

The Nevada Artists Association is excited to announce two Featured Artist Shows beginning Saturday, May 4 by Carson City artists, Cynthia Brenneman and Bruce Nelson.

Dive into an ocean of adventure with Wild Horse Children's Theater as we embark on a journey under the sea in the upcoming production of Disney's "Finding Nemo, Jr." at the Brewery Arts Center Performance Hall in Carson City. This spectacular musical adaptation of the beloved Pixar movie promises to be a wave of fun, friendships, and heartwarming moments that the entire family will enjoy!

UPDATE THURSDAY: The Washoe County Regional Medical Examiner’s Office has identified the two people who died Wednesday morning following the two vehicle crash on I-580 in Carson City. They are Alejandra Hernandez Valtierra, 36, and Viola Santoyo Huizar, 48, both of Carson City.
***
UPDATE 12:42PM: Southbound I-580 in Carson City was opened as of around 11 a.m., said a Nevada State Police spokeswoman, who provided more details of the fatal crash that happened early Wednesday morning.

Both the driver of a car and a truck involved in the crash died. Their names have not been released pending notification of family members. The car, which was going the wrong way — northbound in the southbound lane — struck the truck and caught on fire, according to a NSP preliminary investigation thus far. The vehicle makes are unknown at this time.

Dayton Elementary School in Lyon County was honored Wednesday along 13 other schools including Carson High in Carson City as a Nevada Purple Star School.

Schools receiving the designation have committed to supporting the educational and social-emotional needs of military-connected children and their families.

Junior Park Ranger Day is back this Saturday, April 27 at Riverview Park in Carson City.

Junior Park Ranger Day is an annual event dedicated to help kids complete their Junior Ranger Adventure Guides and be sworn in all in one day.